Teaching your family Islam is an obligation which the head of the household must undertake, in
obedience to the command of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): “O you
who believe! Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire (Hell)
whose fuel is men and stones…” [al-Tahreem 66:6].
This aayah is the
basic principle regarding the teaching and upbringing of one's family, and
enjoining them to do what is good and forbidding them to do what is evil.
There follow some of
the comments of the mufassireen on this aayah, in so far as it pertains to the duties
of the head of the household.
Qutaadah said: “He should command them to obey
Allaah, and forbid them to disobey Him, and direct them in accordance with the
commands of Allaah, and help them to do that.”
Dahhaak and Muqaatil
said: “It is the Muslim’s duty to teach his family, including relatives and
female slaves, what Allaah has enjoined upon them and what He has forbidden.”
‘Ali (may Allaah be
pleased with him) said: “Teach them and discipline them.” Al-Tabari (may Allaah
have mercy on him) said: “We must teach our children and wives the religion and goodness, and whatever they need of good manners.
If the Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to urge the teaching of
female servants, who were slaves, what do you think about your children and
wives, who are free?”
Al-Bukhaari (may
Allaah have mercy on him) said in his Saheeh: “Chapter: a man’s teaching
his female slaves and wife.” Then he quoted the hadeeth of the Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “There are three who will have two
rewards: … a man who has a female slave whom he teaches good manners and
teaches her well, and teaches her knowledge, and teaches her well, then he
frees her and marries her: he will have two rewards.”
Ibn Hajar (may Allaah
have mercy on him) said, commenting on this hadeeth “The chapter heading refers
specifically to female slaves, and to wives by analogy, i.e., teaching one’s wife about her duties towards Allaah and the Sunnah of His Messenger is more
clearly essential than teaching one's female slaves.”
In the midst of all a
man’s activities, work and other commitments, he may forget to allow himself time
for teaching his wife. One solution to this is to allocate some time for the family,
and even for others such as relatives, to hold a study-circle at home.
He can let everyone
know the time and encourage them to come regularly, so that it will be an
ongoing commitment for him and for them. Something similar happened at the time
of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).
Al-Bukhaari (may
Allaah have mercy on him) said: “Chapter: can the women be given a day exclusively
for them to seek knowledge”? and quoted the hadeeth of Abu Sa’eed al-Khudri (may
Allaah be pleased with him): “The women said to the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him): ‘The men always crowd us out and we cannot
reach you, so set aside a day for us when we can come to you.’ So he set aside
a day when he would meet them and teach them.”
Ibn Hajar said: “A
similar report was narrated by Sahl ibn Abi Saalih from Abu Hurayrah, according
to which [the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)] said: ‘Your appointment
is in the house of so and so,’ and he came to them and spoke to them. ’”
What we learn from
this is that women should be taught in their houses, and we see how keen the
women of the Sahaabah were to learn. Directing teaching efforts to men alone,
and not to women, is a serious shortcoming on the part of dai’yahs and heads of
households.
Some readers may ask,
suppose we set aside a day, and tell our families about it
What should we study
in these gatherings? Where do we begin?
I suggest that you
begin with a simple program to teach your family in general, and the women in
particular, using the following books:
The tafseer of
al-‘Allaamah Ibn Sa’di, entitled Tayseer al-Kareem al-Rahmaan fi
Tafseer Kalaam
al-Mannaan,
which is published in seven volumes and is written
in an easy style; you
can read it or teach somes soorahs and passages from it.
Riyaadh al-Saaliheen – you coul discuss
the ahaadeeth quoted, along with the footnotes and the lessons learned from
them. You could also refer to the book Nuzhat al-Muttaqeen.
Hasan al-Uswah bimaa
thubita ‘an Allaahi wa Rasoolihi fi’l-Nuswah, by al-
‘Allaamah Siddeeq
Hasan Khaan.
It is also important
to teach women some of the ahkaam of fiqh, such as the rulings on tahaarah
(purity) and menstrual and post-partum bleeding, salaah, zakaah, siyaam
(fasting) and hajj, if she is able to go; some of the rulings on food and drink, clothing and adornment, the sunan al-fitrah, rulings on mahaarim (who is
a mahram relative and who is not), rulings on singing and photography, and so
on.
Among the important
sources of such information are the fatwas (rulings or edicts) of the scholars,
such as the collections of fatwas by Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz and Shaykh
Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen, and other scholars, whether they are written
fatwas or fatwas recorded on tapes.
Another matter that
may be included in a syllabus for teaching women and family members is
reminding them of lessons or public lectures given by trustworthy scholars and
seekers of knowledge which they can attend, so they can have a variety of
excellent sources for learning.
We should not forget
either the radio programs of Idhaa’at al-Qur’aan al-Kareem; another means of
teaching is reminding family members of the particular days when women can
attend Islamic bookstores, and taking them there, within the guidelines of
sharee’ah [i.e., proper hijaab, etc.
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